Ladies and Gentleman, It's the YUGIOH SHOW!
by animorphs17
Summary: what we have hear is a little bit of everything. Think of this as the Yu-gi-Oh Muppet Show. And who knows, maybe if I get enough reviews, we'll see Yami tapdance
1. Let the Madness begin!

DEDICATION: This chapter goes out to Joy Joy!  
  
AUTHOR NOTE: What is this fic? Well, think of it as a story of many stories. It is going to be kind of like a skit show, SNL, Mad TV, etc. The characters of Yu-Gi-Oh will be each doing their own thing in each part, usually jokes or small acts. By the way, I feel that Serenity is a lesbian and likes Mai! I mean she is always talking about Mai and hanging out with her on the show... Hmmmm... maybe a fic with a Wheeler/Mai love triangle will be in the works... Anyway, let the madness begin!  
  
Little Yugi walks out onto the stage. On it is a single spotlight, illuminating the microphone in front of the large red curtain. After lowering the device half a foot to reach his height Yugi clears his throat.  
  
"LADIES AND GENTLEMAN! IT'S YU-GI-OH!" Yugi yells excitedly throwing his arms into the air as the curtain rises with a big musical beginning. Just then Tristan and Mokuba come dancing out. Yugi runs off stage, into the back as the two start dancing and singing  
  
"Its time to play the music! Its time to light the lights. Its time to raise the curtains on Yu-Gi-Oh tonight!"  
  
Mokuba then brings out a little break dancing. Tristan's eyes narrow and he suddenly starts doing it to. Now Mokuba is growling and starts tap dancing, with Tristan joining in almost instantly. The two keep switching dance routines, trying to out do the other. Suddenly they both just collapse in exhaustion  
  
The scene cuts to Serenity, Mai and Tea in the dressing rooms in just their panties. With a scream they cover themselves and narrow their eyes, but then realizing what part it is, they drop the towels and start singing.  
  
"Its time to put on make up! Its time to dress up right!"  
  
In a flash they both are dressed in their normal clothes and applying a fresh coating of make up. Well... Mai is. Tea got dressed and started a friendship rant on Serenity. Stupid girl. Anyway, Mai swats Tea on the head and poses for the camera, sticking her chest out for the guys with a wink, while Serenity stares openly at Mai.  
  
"It's time to meet the ladies, on the Yu-Gi-Oh show tonight!"  
  
The scene then cuts back to the stage as the musical swells to its climax  
  
Yugi comes out doing his own little side shuffle jig. "But now lets get things started..."  
  
Mai and Tea come out joining in the finale. "On the most sensational..."  
  
Tristan and Kaiba dive out doing a roll to land perfectly on one knee, joining in with the music "Inspirational..."  
  
Duke and Mokuba slide out to join some more. "Celebrational..."  
  
The curtain rises to show various Yu-Gi-Oh monsters and the rest of the cast, minus Joey, to join the finale.  
  
"MUPPETATIONAL! THIS IS WHAT WE CALL THE YU-GI-OOOOOH SHOOOOOOW!"  
  
Yugi looks around confused. "Where's Joey?"  
  
"Heh heh..." came Joey's laugh.  
  
Just then the cannon nobody noticed went off, and out shot Joey with a mighty battle cry, he crashed into a giant gong, making it ring as everyone watched in shock as he landed on the ground. He got up and gave a big stupid thumbs up while everyone shook their heads in annoyance. 


	2. The Comedian is a bear!

DEDICATION: This Chapter goes out to... My baby brother Joey who is in Parris Island, in boot camp for the United States Marines.  
  
AUTHOR NOTE: Feel free to throw in any stupid jokes or ideas for skits for the chars!  
  
"The time has come once again for the likes of the furry and free wheeling, fast and frantic, JOEY WHEELER!" Yugi cries out into the microphone.  
  
Joey comes strutting out in a bear suit with a necktie on. Yugi raises an eyebrow and tries to get away, but Joey grabs Yugi by the scruff of his neck and carries him back to the microphone.  
  
"Not so fast Yuge," Joey says with a smile. "You are going to help me tell the world's funniest joke tonight!"  
  
"I am?" Yugi asks meekly.  
  
"Yep! This is all spontaneous, unrehearsed! Right?"  
  
Yugi raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, it's unrehearsed all right."  
  
"Now all you have to do is rush up to me and say 'Good grief! The Comedian is a bear,' when I say the word hear."  
  
"When you say the word hear?"  
  
"Yep." Joey then turned and faced the camera while Yugi walked off stage. "Howdy! Howdy! Howdy! You're a wonderful looking audience! It's a pleasure to be here!"  
  
Suddenly Yugi comes running up to Joey. "GOOD GRIEF! THE COMIDIAN IS A BEAR!"  
  
"No!" Joey yelled. "Not yet!"  
  
Yugi blinked in confusion. "But you said the word here."  
  
"That was the wrong hear!" Joey sighed in exasperation and Yugi shrugged and walked back off stage. Then Joey turned back to the crowd. "This is a story that you're going to love to hear!"  
  
Again Yugi came charging out. "GOOD GRIEF! THE COMIDIAN IS A BEAR!"  
  
Joey turned and raised his arms at Yugi. "WILL YOU STOP THAT?!"  
  
Now it was Yugi's turn to get angry. "BUT YOU SAID HERE!"  
  
"THAT WAS THE WRONG HERE!"  
  
"WELL HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?!"  
  
"YOU'LL KNOW WHEN YOU HEAR!" Joey shouted.  
  
"GOOD GRIEF! THE COMIDIAN IS A BEAR!" Yugi screamed.  
  
"AIIIIYIEEE!" Joey yelled.  
  
The two started hyper ventilating and glaring at each other angrily. After a minute Joey just shook his head in frustration.  
  
"All right. All right. You will know, when I point," Joey then poked Yugi hard in the chest. "To you."  
  
"I'm never working with him again," Yugi mumbled storming off stage. "I swear, he wants me at the word here and when I do... I'm never doing this again..."  
  
"NO GRUMBLING!" Joey called after Yugi, and then turned back to the audience. "A funny thing happened to me on the way to the theater. There was a group of Yu-Gi-Oh fans at the door, when suddenly, one runs up to me and I hear..."  
  
Joey pointed at Yugi, and then pointed at the ground hard. Yugi came stomping out, clearly frustrated and annoyed with Joey.  
  
"Good grief, the comedian is a bear..." Yugi mumbled quietly.  
  
"NO HE'S A NOT!" Joey cried out with a big smile on. "HE'S A WEARING A NECK TIE! AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! I'm so funny!"  
  
Yugi just shook his head and stormed off stage. 


	3. Play us a game! You're the King of them!

DEDICATION: To my right foot. It's hairy. And it smells occasionally. But where would I be without it? Probably on the ground... Yeah... So thank you right foot. As for left foot, you can go $%&% yourself with a #(&#&( and then take a tricycle and %$#$#$ while the dog barks as you %$(&#$&%&(5 until you got to go to a special doctor to get the %$%$#& box removed!  
  
DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Piano Man  
  
Marik stands on the stage, in front of the mike, with a harmonica in his hand. The curtain rises behind him to show Tristan at a piano. With a crack of his neck Marik starts playing the harmonica in tune to the Piano Man and Tristan picks up with the beautiful sounds of the piano.  
  
"Poor Yugi Muoto was pitiful," Marik sang. "Couldn't have been any shyer."  
  
"HEY!" Yugi's voice rang from backstage.  
  
Marik snickered and continued on. "Tea Gardner still wouldn't notice him, even if his hair was on fire."  
  
"Yeah, and considering the amount of hairspray Yugi uses," Tristan cracked. "That's probably happened more then once."  
  
Yugi's enraged yell rang out from backstage and a shoe flew out, barely missing Tristan's head.  
  
"But then one day he finished that Millennium Puzzle of his," Marik sang on. "That last piece came down. And now Yami plays, all his Shadow Games, and evil fears all over town."  
  
"La diddy da. Diddy da. Diddy daaaa diddy daaaa dumdum." Tristan cooed quietly.  
  
Marik pointed in the direction of where Yugi's cries came from earlier. "Play us a game! You're the King of them. Play us a game tonight. Cause we all could sure use us a hero now, and theirs evil doings tonight."  
  
Marik played a small tune into the harmonica and did a small dance while Tristan played his piano. With a quick glance to the other side of the stage, Marik smiled evilly and grabbed the mike with a laugh.  
  
"Now Joey Wheelers a friend of his, who wants to be a Duel King," Marik smiled. "But to his great surprise, seems Yugi can be loser guys, even while outside it rains."  
  
"WHAT?!?!" came Joey's enraged cry from where Marik had looked a second ago. Joey tried to charge on stage to beat the stuffing out of Marik, but a large black security guard named Butch, swung from the rafters above and threw Joey into a tuba. Joey's angry yells could be heard from inside the tuba as his legs kicked around helplessly from the big hole of the tuba. Tristan and Marik both pointed and laughed for a minute before getting back to the song.  
  
"I must save the world! That's the catchphrase of Yami-Yugi. If you missed it, don't worry he'll say the line, again and again and again."  
  
There was a flash of light from offstage.  
  
"MARIK!" roared Yami-Yugi. "After the show, Me. You. Parking lot!"  
  
Marik laughed and made an inappropriate sign with his hand at Yugi and traded places with Tristan.  
  
"Now Marik's a disgruntled tomb keeper," Tristan sang. "Who never liked living underground. But then something went screwy, and before you knew he, was trying to kill everyone."  
  
Marik growled a little at Tristan and made the gesture with his hand again.  
  
"And he drives around on that bike of his! And he's casting spells with his Rod. Yeah he has the same dumb hair as Yugi, but he's scarier then Odion."  
  
Marik growled and Yugi yelled something. Then the Millennium puzzle flew through the air and hit Tristan on the back while Marik smacked him upside the head with his Millennium rod.  
  
"Play us a game! You're the King of them!" Marik sang. "Play us a game tonight! You're so brave and powerful and magical now! A comb through your hair would be your biggest fight!"  
  
Yugi came out playing an accordion, while Tristan hobbled back to Piano. Yugi grabbed his Millennium Puzzle, and kicked Marik in the ankle as he danced offstage. Marik rubbed his sore ankle and continued to sing.  
  
"It's a pretty good day on the battle blimp. Yami-Marik has bitten the dust. And I heard Joey said, he wants Mai in his bed, and he wants to bury his face in her bust."  
  
"WHAT?!" came the screech of one Mrs. Mai Valentine.  
  
She stormed onstage, shoving Marik out of the way and stormed down to Joey, who had just gotten himself out of the tuba. Turning to see Mai, he smiled and waved, not hearing what Marik had just said.  
  
"Hey Mai. What's up?"  
  
With a slap, that Yugi would later call 'The Slap Heard Around the World', Mai sent Joey back into the tuba. She then proceeded to kick at the tuba and curse at Joey, who was now stuck again in the tuba, confused very much so.  
  
"Ummm... Mai? I was just joking," Marik said. "He didn't say that. I just used it for the song."  
  
"WHA?!" Mai cried in shock. "That means..."  
  
Mai looked at the stuck Joey in embarrassment, and sorrow. She grabbed his legs and pulled him out. Joey glared holes through Mai as she pouted and looked at the ground.  
  
"I... I'm sorry Joey," Mai tried to apologize.  
  
Before Joey could say anything, Mai wrapped him in a tight hug. Joey just smiled, and considering this is trying to be a G fic, I'll let you guess where his face was. When they separated the hug Joey gave Mai a thumbs up.  
  
"Come on Joey," Mai said grabbing his wrist. "You can help me get ready for my act next."  
  
The two left for backstage as Marik and Tristan shook their head in disbelief.  
  
"How?" Tristan mumbled. "How does he get the girls?"  
  
One of Mai's shoes flew out and hit Tristan in the head.  
  
"And Tea is all hot for Yugi now!" Marik sang on. "But Yugi to dumb to tell! Tea don't cry, you can give it a try, again when season three starts!"  
  
Marik closed his eyes and played the harmonica. A second later, Joey, Mai, Yugi, Tea, and Tristan were all advancing on him. Marik stopped the harmonica and sang with his eyes closed.  
  
"Play us a game! You're the King of them! Play us a game tonight! Because we could all sure use us a hero now, and we think that you'll do all right."  
  
Marik played the last verse of the song then opened his eyes and saw the advancing crowd. With an EEP! Marik took off through the crowd.  
  
"GET HIM!" Yugi cried and the angry mob chased after him.  
  
"It was just a song guys!" Marik yelled running. "Don't hurt me!" 


End file.
